Now that we’ve passed the last year and we are now looking forward, I want to talk about the fear of change. Anyone who has made New Year’s resolutions and really wants to succeed understands that through comprimise comes success.
How many of us dream of an idea and don’t have the courage to put it into action? Maybe you dream of changing your job, or you want to open your own business or maybe you want to treat yourself and travel around the world. Maybe you want to move to another place, emigrate, buy a house, start a family, whatever … I’m sure that each one of you has some dreams that is waiting to be fulfilled.
We humans tend to think too much, rationalize, name and classify. No matter how small a decision is, we list the pros and cons and ask ourselves: “Is it worth it?” But what we actually mean is: “Is the effort too big for the reward?“ Or “Is it really better?” This may be a good tactic to make a decision when it comes to small irrelevant things. But when it comes to our hearts desire, these questions are future killers. They suddenly catapult us into a “what-if-thought-scheme”.
What if I don’t like my new job? What if my business is not running well? And if something happens to me on my journey?
All potential bad situations are gathering together and captivating us in our fear. The fear of change. The fear of uncertainty. It paralyzes us and holds us back. Because here, in our current situation, we feel safe. Even if we don’t like it, we know what we have and it takes no effort to stay here. And with comfort and lack of struggle suddenly our dream isn’t so important anymore …
“It’s okay, just as it is”, we convince ourselves. Over time, however, we continue to realize even with that comfort that we’re not completely happy and that we want to change something.
And if you have reached this point for the second, third, or seventh time, I urge you to ask yourself the following two questions:
- How long can I manage to keep sitting here, mourning my dream?
- Is it worth it to move my ass and work for my dream?
When you see that it is the time to take the reins of your metaphorical sleigh, there is only one more thing left to do: jump over your shadow and overcome your fears.
STEPS INTO THE FUTURE
Your decision to change is the first step towards creating your new future. Congratulations!
Some people know exactly what steps they have to take. Others might be a bit overwhelmed and don’t know how to start. If you are one of those people who are just a little bit at a loss for where to go next, I’d like to offer you some support.
Here are some tips on how to approach your dream step by step.
Go to the internet, read articles and blogs and get informations about your plans. Surely you’re not the only one with this idea. How did others do it? Ask your friends and acquaintances, or maybe you know someone specific, who can give you some advice.
TALK ABOUT IT
Share your vision with people you trust. Don’t be ashamed to talk about it. The more you talk about your plans, the more natural it becomes for yourself to start creating them. Be sure to announce your plan to those people who are happy to help and support you and stay away from jealous and begrudging people who cannot take the steps require to enhance their lives.
EXPERIENCE YOUR VISION
It’s important that your senses are aware of what is to come. Say your plan out loud, over and over again. Look at pictures of what your future might look like. Sink into daydreams. Write down your plan by hand. Visualize yourself in a new situation. Try to add more and more details to your vision. Soon you will have an accurate picture of your future and it will be much easier to work towards it.
Good things take time! Be patient and take small steps towards your goal. People who want to do too much at once run the risk of getting tangled up or losing track. This can discourage you very quickly. If you set small intermediate goals which you’re easily able to reach, it will make you happier and it also motivates you to move on to bigger challenges.
TRANSITIONS ARE PART OF THE OVERALL PLAN
Sometimes it happens that you’re not satisfied with your “new situation”. You’re not where you want to be yet. But that is because you know that your journey of fulfilling your dream is not over yet. You have reached an intermediate goal or you’re now in a transitional phase. Maybe it’s a compromise you have to make to get closer to your goal.
Accept the compromise! An interim destination is just an interim destination and serves as a springboard to the next stage. Even if that’s not what you want, it’s part of the overall plan and brings you closer to your goal. Your motto should be: There is no turning back! Look ahead and continue to work on your dream.
ALLOW TO CHANGE YOUR PERSONALITY
The desire for change usually comes when our own values and beliefs have changed. But sometimes we struggle to completely surrender to the change taking place. What holds us back are old habits that we need to let go off. Remember, sometimes it’s important to step outside of our comfort zone: it is the key to change and growth!
Use this knowledge and create your new Identity. Write down who you want to be, where you want to go, and start from there. It is so important to create something physical out of your thought, and it especially helps to be able to look back in time at your plans, and to see the journey you have taken to fulfill them. The first step is always the hardest, but once you look back you realise it was never really that hard at all.
Maybe now you want to be strong and adventurous. Or you decide to be an outgoing entrepreneur instead of the lazybones you used to be. Whatever it is – be it! As the saying goes “Fake it, till you make it”. From this very moment. The new attitude will help you to be confident in what you do. And suddenly everything gets easier.
This last point is very important to me and helped to realize my dream. Times of doubt can’t always be avoided. Sometimes they’re just part of the journey. Don’t take life too seriously. Everything passes, good and bad times come and go. Everything is always on the move and if you’re aware of that, it’s only a matter of time before it starts going uphill again. Without the lows, there are no highs, and without the highs there are no lows!
And, if you are struggling, before you toss in the towel: Take your time, return to yourself and trust that everything will be alright. Trust that the universe won’t let you down now that you have finally taken the step towards your goals. Sometimes it’s not exactly what you’d expect, only in retrospect you realize that maybe it had to be this way.
Now gather your courage and chase your dreams!
Preview of the next post
As already announced at the beginning of the year, the next post will be a „People Story“. (Wohoo!)
In keeping with the topic of this article, Becca Cronk will talk about her personal experience of her trip around the world in 2014.
Lots of love,